Turning point
I discovered Saturday afternoon that Jake loves his rawhide bone. Specifically, he loves playing with it in the back yard, snatching it off the ground with a playful lunge and running around like a great big dork with it in his mouth. After a moment, he settles down to gnaw it for a bit, making that funny grinding noise dogs make when they chew. Then he gets up and wanders a few steps away before turning back, appearing to be surprised at the sight of the bone, and repeats the whole thing.
It’s pretty funny to watch him enjoy himself like that.
Yesterday morning just before we left for Smallville to paint in the front room, I let Jake out back for a potty trip so he wouldn’t be uncomfortable during the ride out there. Sure enough, after making sure to mark the birdbath and one of the trees, he caught sight of his rawhide bone and spent a few minutes going through his routine. It was nice to see him prancing around, head and tail high with joy and pride.
I opened the door for him to come in, and like a good boy he dropped the bone and came right in. I’d like to think it was because I called him, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t.
Tom Cullen and Spot were both in the den with me when Jake came back in. Tommy was twining around my legs, looking for love. Spot was just checking to see if maybe somebody had some food nearby (his normal state). Jake caught sight of Tommy and puppy-bowed to him in the classic “I want to play” movement. Tommy, spaz that he is, fluffed his tail and hissed.
I think Jake thought Tommy was playing, but I don’t know. He might’ve been scared. As he wheeled away from Tommy, Spot was right there, trying to slink by. Jake caught sight of him and kind of pounced on Spot with his front paws, bowling Spot over. Let me be clear: Jake did not attack Spot, and even though he was playing and wasn’t malicious or biting, Spot didn’t know that. Spot weighs about nine pounds, Jake weighs roughly ten times that. Those paws were as big as Spot.
We joke about Spot a lot, about how he’s always begging for food or having diarrhea from his nerves, but he’s thirteen and I’ve had him far and away longer than any other pet that ever claimed me as its own. Spot showed up on my back porch as a stray kitten back in mid-1993 and he’s been with me ever since. He’s getting old now, arthritic and slow. I joke about him, but I love him like a child.
When Jake pounced on him and knocked him down, Spot screamed like I’ve never heard. I leapt over to get in between them. Spot was already running away with a pronounced limp. I’m not going to lie here. It took every bit of will power I possess not to get mad at Jake and yell at him, even though I knew he hadn’t been trying to hurt Spot.
Spot still ended up hurt, no matter the intention.
I felt sorry for Jake, afterwards. I think Spot’s yell and my dive scared him, because he went completely submissive, flat on the ground with big dark eyes.
“What was that?” Robyn cried, running in from the computer room.
“Jake hurt Spot. Keep an eye on him.”
I left the dog with Robyn and ran upstairs, where I found Spot under the bed in the master bedroom. He was puffed out and unwilling to come out for several minutes. When he finally did, he still limped, but it already seemed a little better. I sat with him in the floor, trying to calm him.
“Is he okay?” Robyn called up.
“I think so. His leg is hurt, but it’s better now than it was at first.”
I put Spot in his favorite bed by the window and went back downstairs. Robyn burst into tears as soon as she saw me. Trust me, after ten years with her, I can definitively say one thing: my wife is not one given to tears easily. I knew this was a big thing to her.
We had a long talk, and lot of things spilled out of her. How stressed she’d been since we got Jake. How much her life felt disrupted with him in the house. How much she wanted to love him, but just didn’t yet and didn’t know how much she ever would. How she simply wasn’t a dog person, no matter how much she tried.
In retrospect, they’re things I should’ve noticed, things I should’ve seen even before we got Jake, but didn’t in my eagerness to get a big dog for protecting the family.
Every dog pack has a pecking order. From the highest alpha male to the lowest runt of a pup, each one knows its place in the group. In group Fred, the woman I’ve loved for ten years and the cats I’ve loved from one to thirteen years all rank higher than the dog I’ve loved for three days. It might make me a bad man to say something like that, but that’s the way things are.
“I’ll take him back tomorrow,” I said.
The relief on her face was plain, and she asked me if I hated her. As if I could. We talked a long time about whether or not we should take Spot to the emergency vet to get his leg checked, and ultimately decided to wait and see how his limp did. This morning he was favoring his back leg, but only a little.
I planned to take Jake to the shelter today, and mentioned my decision on a message board where I hang out. To make a long story short, one of the guys who admins the board volunteered to take Jake. He lives near Nawlins, and this morning Robyn and I loaded Jake up and drove to Meridian, Mississippi to meet him and give him over. The guy lives in the country and already has a German Shepherd and a Collie, and was very excited to be able to save Jake from going back to the shelter.
So, boys and girls, sometimes pets really do go live on a farm in the country. 
Hate me if you want, berate and flame me if you feel the need, tell me to give Jake a chance to get some training. The decision has been made, and whether or not anyone approves of it doesn’t factor into things. Like the incident with the first dog and the spud a few years ago that ended with a return (if you’re not a long-time reader, you don’t know what I’m talking about), only the family matters. I will protect my flock—both its physical and mental well-being—any way I can, even when it hurts.
Still a good boy.
The stars aligned yesterday afternoon, and led to this picture.
I cannot believe you got all of those cats together for the photo. Has to be photoshop magic.
Don’t feel badly — you DID find the dog a good home. Like I said before in posts, I had to let the first dog I adopted go back to the vet who raised him (in a kennel). At least I know the dog is still there, and has the only home he’d ever known (someone dumped him in front of the vet clinic when he was a pup).
I could not trust a HUGE dog around my cats either. And in fact, though I LOVE my two little dogs, they still do not get along with the cats.
My cats have their separate quarters, and stay out there all day; at night, the dogs go into their crate, and sleep while I let the cats into the house to spend time with me. It is SO difficult for cats/dogs to get along, after they are adults. Had puppies/kittens been raised together, it might be easier. Plus, a big dog (even if it likes cats) might hurt the cat unintentionally.
I knew something was up when Robyn’s post (and yours) were late.
You made the right decision, and like I stated: You found the dog a home. That is what counts.
Fred, I can certainly understand. God, he is a handsome big boy. I’m so happy to know that he didn’t have to go back to the shelter. I assume(heh) he will get lots of love with his new master and have beautiful days spent with his new canine friends.
Anyone who’s read you and Robyn knows how much you love animals and how much you do for strays, so any negative comments you get would have to be from people who know little about you. It’s so hard to predict how animals will get along together. Not that my opinion matters, but I think you absolutely did the right thing. I’m sure Jake will be very happy in the new home you found for him.
Stop getting dogs, you have a gun for godsake. Teach your girls how to shoot it.
I think he’ll have a fine time with other dogs that are closer to his size.
Aw,Fred,I’m sorry. I understand your decision. I have three pet cockatiels and can’t have a cat or dog for fear of an unintentional,or intentional incident from a cat or dog.
I think that a fully fenced yard with an automatic gate would be worth the investment for your piece of mind. Motion detecting lamps,those electronic driveway intruder announcing thingys,no trespassing signs… whatever you got to do to make yourselves feel better.
A Great Pyranese is an awful big package to deal with for people who are more cat than dog people. In the end I feel you did what is right for both The Family and Jake.
OH. Last comment, I forgot to mention this and even though circumstances have changed since then, I feel the information is still relevant…
Never underestimate the psycological effect of a “Beware of Dog” sign. Last time I meant to say the burglar doesn’t have to know the dog is friendly. But they don’t have to know you don’t have a dog either. =0)
I believe firmly in the hierarchy of the pack myself. I’ve made equally difficult decisions on that line too (albeit with worse endings–how fortunate you were to find him a nice home.) You’ve got to do what you’ve got to do.
Fred–
Don’t feel bad. You made the decision that was right for your family. Sometimes things work out and sometimes things don’t. Let it go. I still love ya!!!
Karen
For all you do (rescuing kittens hit by cars, comes to mind), this one is another good thing. Most important, I hope that you can share updates about Jake’s new home and his siblings. Pics perhaps?
Well Fred, being a dog person and not a cat person all can say is Thanks to your efferts it sounds like Jake has a great home. Who knows were he would have ended up had you not given it a try. And you were right to (get rid of him sounds to harsh) remove him from your home, it was in the best interest of your cats (and Robyn of course).
It’s your home and your family (cats included) that matters most. Atleast you tried. If you’re not a dog person, you’re not a dog person. Simple as that. I’m not a cat person and no one could turn me into one. Thanks for taking Jake out of the shelter and finding him another good home.
Maybe someday you will try again, but I would suggest a basset hound next time. Smaller dog, with a very deep bark. You’d never know behind that door is a loveable lapdog that probably wants to lick you to death, from the way they bark. They won’t protect you, but they might scare people away. Oh I don’t know, I just love my basset hound so much, I can’t see how anyone else wouldn’t love one too. haha
Anyway, don’t feel bad about your decision. Jake will probably be happier anyway, having other dogs to play with.
Unfortunately I’m going to have to agree with Stef here. I saw this coming from a mile away.
I hate to say I saw this coming too, but hey - sometimes we make decisions with our hearts rather than our heads. I think you did right by Jake, both by getting him out of the shelter and finding him a better home when yours didn’t work out.
(And since you know his new dad, hopefully you can get updates on how he’s doing.)
Wow. I don’t know what to say.
Actually I do. I’m glad he found a new home and didn’t end up back at the shelter. I shudder to think of how many animals are picked up, brought to a new home, then uprooted again.
I hope he gets to stay with his new family to his final days.
A previous poster was absolutely right, don’t underestimate the power of a Beware of Dog sign. But personally, take it a step further. BORROW a dog for a few days while at the property. Certainly someone you know that you are friends with has a dog. Just borrow it for the afternoon and return him every night. Give it a few days.
My point is just to let people SEE the dog. Especially the bad news guy. Then get those signs posted all over the property and relax. The message will be clear. After the dog has been seen once, that is all it takes to put that little bit ot doubt into someone’s bad intentions.
If the dog is not there and he comes on the property again, yell loudly to Robyn to hold the dog back - no barking is necessary. The message will sink in - if he has already seen a pooch out there that is enough. Fear Fred, fear.
Plus the friend’s dog gets a field trip. Heaven for a pooch.
You did the right thing. Part of me is sad for Jake, but I am thrilled that he has a real home and didn’t go back to the shelter. That really makes it okay for me.
Good luck@
Sometimes, big dogs and cats just do not mix.. even if there is no will. Like someone above said, oftens times they have be raised together.
However, if you ever do feel like getting a dog again.. go for a small, cat-sized dog. A big dog is a big dog, and cats are small.. so at least with a smaller dog, the cats have a chance. Papillons are supposedly great ‘alert’ dogs, as in they’ll bark at anyone coming near them (even someone they know but only for a minute). They’re also very small, highly intelligent, and cuddlers.
First off, I have to say that I think Jake is the cutest big old lovable looking dog–and I am a dog person. But I have to be honest with you–what touched my heart the most was hearing in your words how you put your wife and family and kitties first. I’ve been reading your’s and Robyn’s sites for quite awhile now and feel that you all are friends and I just have to say that I have long admired your marriage and how well-suited you are for each other! And I think it’s absolutely great that you both have a special place in your hearts for homeless animals. Jake will have a wonderful home because of you!
That’s ok Fred,I’m sure the cats are happier now. Besides,Jake is better off on a farm. Now he has dog pals to romp and play with. You did your good deed by getting him out of the shelter.
At least you found Jake a good home. It’s many of those reasons that I won’t get a cat or a bird until my dogs are gone. This is their home too and I won’t make them uncomfortable. The most important thing is Jake has a good home.
Please don’t feel too terrible. Sometimes a good animal is just a bad fit. I’ll bet Jake will love his new home (and new doggie friends).
Eleven years ago, my then boyfriend (now husband of many years) brought home a “companion” kitten for my princess kitty (my equivalent of Spot). They weren’t terribly compatible, but I felt guilty thinking about taking the kitty back to the shelter. He’s a nice cat, but he was irritating to the princess until she died last year. You made the right choice for everyone…including Jake.
When I was a young teenager, my dad brought home what he’d told us was a siberian husky “pup.” We expected a cute little ball of fur that we could happily introduce to our alpha dog, Maggie (a shetland sheepdog who’d ruled the house for five years at that point).
The “pup” turned out to be a giant, 10-month-old, untrained moron of a dog. Don’t get me wrong: Tasha was beautiful and sweet, but she was dumb as a box of rocks. Worse, she thought she was a lapdog. When she crawled under the coffee table in the living room (she didn’t fit, by the way, and lifted it off the floor, knocking over and destroying several knick-knacks), we laughed. When she chewed dish towels and slippers to ribbons, we laughed. But when she was playing and bit right through Maggie’s foot, she had to go, even though Tasha hadn’t meant any harm. You made the right call.
I have dogs and cats together but the difference was they were raised together so they don’t think it’s odd at all and get along famously. They are closer to the same size too and I think that helps.
I think you did the right thing
And I’m glad he is going to such a good home.
Oh Fred. What a shame. I felt I should comment again since I did on your last entry, just to assure you I wasn’t hating you from a distance! But if the dog doesn’t fit, he doesn’t fit. Even ‘dog people’ often aren’t ‘large dog people’. You did the right thing by finding him a good home. Will you keep in touch with the new owner?
Similar situation here…a beagle puppy landed at my house! Been like a month now. Robyn said it best, I feel as though my life has been interupted. We have 3 cats, I feel nothing for this dog, don’t have anything to do with it, etc. It’s a pain in the ass to me not to mention the fact that this dog will effect my life for the next 10+ years which I am not happy about that my wife does not see. “Your daughter would be heartbroken” she tells me……she thought I was Lucifer himself wehn I told her I was gonna take the dog to the pound and when my daughter got home from school I was gonna say the dog passed away. TODAY, when I was laying down to sleep (I work nights) the wife comes by and has this cut on her lip…the dog did it but is real vauge as yo how she has this cut on her lip….I damned hate dogs, I really do and this damed dog in the house is making me recent the fact that she got this damned thing!!!!!!!!!!
Random thoughts / comments / answers:
1. I know the new owner through the online place where we both hang out. We should pretty easily be able to keep in contact. I’ll be asking for pictures from time to time, but I don’t know if he’s a camera dork like we are. I know he has a digital camera, and has put up pictures of his two dogs, so I’m guessing he’ll be able to give me some.
2. Jake was and is a good dog. He should make a good addition to the pack there, once he gets out of his shell. He was here long enough to just start showing his personality.
3. Spot seems normal today.
4. I hadn’t realized how much time all the cats were spending upstairs until last night, when they were all downstairs. Especially Mister Boogers. He was acting like the king of the roost again.
5. I need a “forget the dog, beware of owner” sign.
6. Re: guns. Guns are good, but useless if no one’s home. Jake was to act as a deterrent then, too. Burglar alarms are good, but most burglars know—especially out of the city—that they still have several minutes before they need to be concerned with the police showing up.
although i may not agree that was your only choice nor your comment on protecting your family but you made the decision right for you and really for jake. no one can judge you. i am sorry it did not work at for you and jake but at least you made the decison fast and he did not have a chance to really bond so he will be o.k. he is a beautiful dog.
oops, i neglected to say. i am glad that spot is recovering and was not seriously injured.
I’m sorry Jake didn’t work out. But it’s best this way, and you all know it. no more dogs. maybe get a bigger cat for the country? like a small mountain lion? that oughtta scar away the unwanteds… we ARE dog people (had cats for most of my life too) and we’ve had 4 Pyrs, and they are special dogs, but a lot of work to them…like bears in a china shop too… they need lots of wide open spaces.
Awww. I’m glad you were able to find Jake a good home. I’ll miss the cute doggy pictures! But all the more cat pictures to love, right?
I would love to have a dog and my son would also love to have a dog but my husband is not a dog person either so we don’t have a dog. It is the right decision to make when everyone in the family can’t agree to something as big as this. It is a family thing because everyone has to look after the family pets not just one person especially dogs. They are high maintenance animals. I’m sorry that you had to get rid of Jake, glad to hear that Spot is better.
My Dad actually had that decal on his door when I was growing up. I think I need one, too.
I wish my husband was as considerate about the dog. I honestly wouldn’t have one if not for him. *I* have to bathe him every week as it is. Luckily there’s never been an issue with our cats. They rule the roost, and the dog grew up with that knowledge.
I’m sad for you but it sounds as if the correct decision was made.
It’s one of the reasons we’ve decided to wait until we’re down to two. With the two oldest being the age they are by the time they go the two youngest (who are brothers, therefore the same age) should be around 9ish. Which isn’t too old or frail for them to defend themselves if need be. We also plan on getting a puppy so it’ll be roughly the same size as they are in the beginning. That’s all the plan, we’ll see how it actually goes.
I look forward to seeing progress pictures of Jake. It sounds like he’s gone to a really good home.
Hey, Jake got out of a shelter and got himself a nice new home. That’s all that matters. Good for you Fred, even if you just got to “foster” him for a little while.
A rescue is a rescue. No matter where the dog ends up.
You didn’t sign a contract with the shelter saying that you’d return the dog to them if it didn’t work out, did you? Most all shelters and rescues in my area have that as part of the contract - that the dog will be returned to them if at any time the adopters can not keep it. Most of the time, just a phone call with an update of the new owners contact information will suffice, but probably something you want to check into just in case!