Adventures in freakdom.
In February 2006, I made this post, a link to little girls who participate in beauty pageants, over in my Crazy Links blog. In the sixteen months since, it’s taken on a weird sort of life of its own, culminating in me receiving an email from the boyfriend of a pageant girl this morning asking me to remove his girlfriend’s name or take the whole thing down.
Crazy stuff, and kind of a fun read.
Taking a page from my wife, I’m going to answer some comment questions here:
If you are bothered by the idea of things leaking and spilling in the truck bed, have you thought of buying a truck bed liner?
I’m definitely not concerned about leaking paint in the bed of the truck. The car, on the other hand, I would’ve been pretty upset, but trucks are made for that.
Well, trucks like Jezebel are.
I’ve contemplated a spray-on liner to protect things I put in the truck, though. I’m sure it would come in handy the next time we buy some big antique something at an auction.
Not trying to start shit. Just wondering. Why is it important that there were lots of Hispanic customers?
It’s not important, it was interesting to me that of six individual customers (plus one caller) in the place, I was the only non-Hispanic. As this journal is generally about life as it’s viewed through my eyes, feel free to think me a racist for noticing that I was the only non-Hispanic customer there.
I did my best as a white man to oppress all the other customers while I was there, but I’m not sure if I was successful or not (I got too excited about my truck to give it my all).
How is the garden affecting your overall bottom line in general, and your food bill, in particular?
Also- have you ever thought (once you get the hang of it) of putting in another, larger garden (perhaps where the pond was?) and selling your veggies? Perhaps its because we’re in the uppity north, but restaurants are always looking for organic, locally grown veggies, and if yours are up to par you can make some side money selling your crops or joining a veggie co-op. Ever thought of doing that?
The overall effect of the garden on our bottom line right now is negative—but that’s to be expected. I’m having to buy lots of things to support it: the cultivator, hoes, hoses, getting a water line run, gloves, tomato cages, fertilizer, etc. With the exception of the fertilizer, those are mostly one-time (or ‘few times over a lifetime’) purchases.
We just made another big garden purchase this week (and I hope I’m not stealing any of Robyn’s thunder here) in the form of a canner, jars, and the Blue Ball canning book. Again, more or less a one-time expense, but a hefty one. Overall, we’ll be losing money on the garden this year. Next year or the year after, however, should be different.
Robyn’s dad told me when he was here that we’d always spend more on our garden than it saved us. I guess we’ll find out. I don’t count my time in the cost of the garden, because the garden’s not really keeping me from anything except boredom and little things around the house I don’t want to do. That’s a plus, as far as I’m concerned.
As to the food bill, the garden’s having great benefit. We don’t really buy vegetables any more (because really, is it possible to get tired of squash, green beans, and green tomatoes?) unless a recipe calls for something we don’t have, which saves some money. Another big savings comes in the form of lunchtime salads for me. At $3.00+ per bag, salad’s expensive when you go through four bags a week.
Not any more — I eat leftover dinner veggies with lunch, and cherry tomatoes.
I would guess the garden is saving us about $100 per month on groceries. In another couple of months, when the melons start coming in, I’ll be able to stop buying fruit for a while, which will mean more money saved. An added benefit is that the garden making us try new recipes (like “green tomato chili” this weekend, woohoo!) because we have so much food.
Even better than the savings is the taste. Nothing’s as good as eating food that’s one hour—or less—off the plant. The taste beats the grocery store any day, especially when you’re talking about things that we normally buy frozen, like green beans. There’s a world of difference in the taste and texture.
Now for the part that will tick off some people.
I’m not an organic grower, nor do I intend to be one. I have no qualms about ripping into a bag of fertilizer or lime, or opening a bottle of liquid Sevin to solve a particular problem. Particularly the Sevin. Bugs are horrendous in the deep south, and I’ll take any tool I can get to keep them from eating the garden. The green beans are suffering right now because I don’t want to spray them and the leaves are getting eaten to hell. After you spray, you need to wait three days before you harvest again, and with the beans already producing 3 meals’ worth every single day I’m dreading going so long without picking.
Next year, I plan to put down a chemical pre-emergent over much of the garden to help with the weeds. One thing I do plan to do that’s a little more natural is harvest chicken shit from the henhouse for fertilizer. It’s full of nitrogen, I have lots of it, and it’s free. You can’t get any better than that.
I joke with Robyn about how I should till up the whole back 40 next year and make it a pick-it-yourself garden, but I’m only kidding. Probably I’ll try to sell some of our melons around work if they do as well as I expect, because they can’t be frozen or stored, but that’s about it. If I can pull enough from a garden to keep us fed the whole year, I’ll consider it a done deal.
But the thought of extra money IS nice.
I want to make the garden a little bigger next year, to make for more room between the rows. This year was the learning year; next year ought to be the really productive one. I’ll probably also skip the onions next year because they don’t offer much bang for the buck (ie, they’re cheap in the store, and a pain in the ass to plant). I think I’ll also look for some good stringless bush green beans next year. This year we have both bush and pole (hee!) beans. The pole beans taste better, but the bush beans are easier to deal with.
And on the note of the garden, here’s a preview of coming attractions:

The corn, it is a-silkin’.
If you check the big version, you can see more stuff in the background:
bug-eaten green bean leaves, okra, black-eyed peas, and tomatoes in the very back.
You might also see an onion or two peeking up in there.

We have three of the cutest little eggplants. This is the largest.
I’ve started letting the girls out in the back yard in the afternoons. They seem to like it, and run around as if they had no heads, hunting for bugs.
The cats also like to hang out in the back yard.
Time for an experiment.

Mister Boogers hates chickens.
But wouldn’t be opposed to tasting one.
Conclusion: the cats are interested in the chickens, but scared of them. The chickens are mostly only interested in eating and shitting.
If you want to get notified whenever Fred writes a journal entry, this link will do the trick.
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I love that you can see Miz Poo sitting at the screen door, checking out the activities.
How in the heck do you round them all up and get them back inside their pen? I can imagine the world’s funniest anaimal clip in my head!
Audri - the chickens are trained.
No, really.
They come running to me when I say “chick chick chick chick” in an especially high voice, because I do that every time I feed them. Pavlov knew what he was talking about. Robyn says we need to get video of it, but we haven’t yet.
You are going to have some really yummy eggs! Cage-free bug-eatin’ chickens are the best! And your garden looks awesome, too! It’s been so cool to keep up with all the new projects you and Robyn have put your hands to - it’s really impressive how you two have learned so much since you bought the new house. I realize there’s been plenty of trial and error along the way … not to mention hard work … but the results are truly amazing.
I like my spray-in bed liner, which I did get to protect the bed of the truck, but also has a sort of hidden benefit of making it less slippery in there. Ever try to stop with a cooler in the back of a truck with a drop-in liner, or naked? It’s, “sliiiiiide, clunk. Sliiiiiide, clunk,” for the whole ride. Not so much with a spray-in. (Well, and tying it down, but I don’t tie everything down.)
Fred, next year try planting garlic between the rows in your garden. The smell keeps away the bugs. I’m glad you did’nt buy “no ugly truck”. As for the garden, freeze lots of corn, it tastes so good in the winter. Just think of all the good soup you can make on those cold winter days with all those canned and frozen vegetables. Thanks for sharing the photos, I love looking at them.
This link:
http://eartheasy.com/grow_nat_pest_cntrl.htm
Has some homemade remedies. I use the Ivory Soap/Vegetable Oil/Baking Soda on my ornamentals with great success against scale, white fly and powder mildew. Hope this helps if you ever want to be an organic farmer. FYI I’m not for or against chemicals. To each his/her own
The organic linky post above is from me, I forgot to fill in my name heh! Must be from all those pestisides in my bag salad
I’d be willing to make a bet that if any strange cats or dogs were to come into your yard,YOUR cats would defend the chickens. Even IF it were to save the chickens for THEIR consumption later. :o)
I used Dr.Bronner’s liquid soap,diluted with water,to spray the aphid-laden leaves. I rinsed them clean after awhile and boy,them leaves shure were shiny!
Dr. Bronner’s eucalptus soap applied on your pulse points keeps away the mosquitos.Lord knows those critters like us fat girls so I was a prime test subject. It works like a charm.I am able to stay outside for hours longer during skeeter prime-time.
You’re a good farmer,Fred.I’m a farmer’s daughter and former Ag student and your crops and chickens look awesome.
Are you planning on planting any fruit trees? Talkin’ about bang for the buck, home-grown fruit will
not only save you loads of cash, most fruit tastes best when allowed to ripen on the tree and picked
when still warm from the sun. You ought to be able to get some fantastic peaches where you live. It
takes a few years before you see any results, but then it’s so worth the effort!
Here’s a recipe to inspire you, on fruit. I was given this recipe in 1972, by a lady who was in her 80s
at the time. She called it:
MIDSUMMER MARMALADE
4 cups peeled diced canteloupe (2 to 2/1/2 lb. melon)
1 whole orange chopped fine
1 whole lemon chopped fine
3 cups coarsely diced peeled peaches (4 or 5)
5 cups sugar
1/2 tsp salt
3 tbsp finely cut candied ginger
Cook canteloupe, orange and lemon in a 6-quart kettle for
10 minutes. Add peaches, sugar and salt. Boil fruit for
20 minutes, stir often. Add ginger and reduce heat and
cook until thick.
Ladle the jam into 5 clean warmed half-pint jars; put on
lids according to the directions on the package, and process
in boiling water bath for 10 minutes. Cool jars on a folded
towel.
This is the most delicious jam imaginable. It is probably
wonderful on hot biscuits, but I have it on hot buttered toast.
It is summer in a jar — you must try it.
Marian, I planted peach, apple, and plum trees back in March. Matter of fact, I just noticed in Lowe’s this afternoon that all their $17 fruit trees are on sale for half off; I’m tempted to go get more.
How to freeze melons:
Select firm-fleshed, well-colored, ripe melons. Cut in half, remove seeds and rind. Cut melons into slices, cubes or balls.
- Syrup pack
Pack into containers and cover with 30 percent syrup, leave headspace, seal and freeze.
- Unsweetened pack
Pack into containers, leaving no headspace, seal and freeze.
Best if eaten slightly frozen.
Is there a rooster among the girls?
Hey Fred! I just read a very small article in the British version of Country Living that if you feed your chickens grass, weeds and green things, their yolks will come out very yellow — and I know you do. Love that! ALSO, they said if you let them into your garden, they’ll weed your garden for you. Time for another experiment?
That corn is as high as an elephant’s thigh. (I’ve always wanted an opportunity to say that
Here is a link to an example of what Lynn was talking about. They call it “chicken tractors” :
http://www.farmradio.org/english/radio-scripts/39-4script_en.asp
Everything looks wonderful! I am jealous that I do not have enough room for a massive garden. The yard is actually big enough for a smallish garden, but the entire yard is covered in shade, which I am not willing to sacrifice. I just have a few tomato plants in pots and some strawberries as well. The ‘maters are coming along very nicely, but the strawberries were under about 4 inches of water (gotta love kiddles) for a few days so not so sure about them.
The post from your linky page with all of the pageant lovers is quite interesting. I am trying to restrain myself for cutting loose on them. It seems like they need to spend a bit more time with education and a little less on the primping.
I was hoping someone else would ask so that I didn’t have to be the goofy one, but what is that stuff on the back steps? My imagination can not even come up with an acceptable guess.
Keep up the good work! Love seeing the chicks, too, just glad I don’t have to dodge the poo. *snicker*
Paula - yep, I’ve even got a book called “Chicken Tractor”. I’ve got the stuff in the garage to build one (PVC / chicken wire), but I’m having second thoughts. It pains me to coop them up in something so small, because I’m all mushy about animals like that. Couple the cramped space with the nightmarish heat we’ve been having (it’s especially bad in the garden because I’ve been watering so much the humidity is way up in there) and I feel like it would be downright mean to do that to them. They’re doing a great job of de-bugging and de-ticking the back yard, though!
Kristina - I saw some pictures of someone’s “garden” the other day that was nothing more than plants here and there in their flowerbeds and around trees. It was kind of neat: a couple of squash plants, a tomato or two, and I think even an eggplant. They had it hidden pretty well.
The stuff on the back steps is two clear plates that you set potted plants on, and the red things are vinyl-covered hangers that screw into a wall (or post). Like, you’d screw one in and use the two little arms to hold a broom or rake or something.